Kagum dgn doktor-doktor yang boleh mengajar pelajar perubatan

The life in HSB and HTAR is totally a diff one. We actually learn more from the docs in HTAR instead of HSB. Or maybe just this current posting. But I know that my knowledge is lacking when Im at HTAR, not that Im saying Im good in HSB, its just that, my knowledge is not being challenged there. Anyhoos, as medical student, I should learn things on my own, read more things.

Oh well, EOP for surgery starts tomorrow, May Allah ease our journey. All the best 4th year! :D

I wish we could go back to the times where we make mistakes and we could  correct our mistakes, and everything will be better. Perfectly better.

But life just doesn't work that way. So all I can do is move forward, never give up (even if when it gets rough) and do what ever my heart says.

EOP is in a week. All the best!

So dead, or work harder?

So, they said medical students will not get a job by next year. I am going to graduate only in 1 and half year. I am so dead.

So probably to get a job is to get good result.
Be a better student, I mean an excel student to get a job. Not a better job, but to get a job. We medical student don't need a better job like other professions, there are no such thing as better job in medical field. So yeah, if you graduate as an MBBS student, you get a degree to work as a doctor. Nothing more or less.

And previously, they dont need extravaganza stuffs in the resume, as long as you pass yr MBBS programme you can work. (I guess it goes that way tho, if Im wrong, please correct me). But I think for future graduates, we should get better performance to get a job.

So yeah, lets work harder and strive for excellence to a level that they don't have a reason not to give us the job, in simple, means they want us to be part of them cause we are awesome and brainiacs.

All the best to medical future-grads :)


http://www.nst.com.my/nation/general/no-jobs-for-medical-grads-next-year-1.396549

Siapa cakap study medic, dapat pass pun ckup? There's two different meaning for "cukup". Yes, cukup utk nak dapat scroll masa grad ckp "this person has graduated from MBBS".. But, cukup ke ilmu di dada nak rawat patient?

I had this so called "kesedaran" when I passed my third year and getting in fourth year. Everyone says, cukup lah pass je, xdistinction pun.. I was one of them. But during the long holiday, it strikes my mind, it is easy to pass but will I be able to be one successful doctor in the future? Getting a certificate with flying colours pun, if we can't apply what we study, if our brain cannot think on its own, whats the purpose of getting good grades kan?

My point here is, I need to get my ass on my books.

I'm just another 1 and half year away to graduate(insyaAllah), but am I preparing myself for the future? Or I just want to pass with lack of knowledge? The choice is in my hand. Never too late..

Tolonglah study at least sejam sehari sebelum tertidur. Even though bak kata this doc "you have to study at least EIGHT hours a day". I wish my day has 72 hours per day. I wish.

Sometimes,

 all you need is someone to be there even though you know

that person was never there,

and never will.

But, you were caught in the middle of nowhere,

and gets nowhere.

Its.. heart breaking.

 

What would you do if you know someone lies to you, yes directly to your face.

But you didnt have the guts to say "I know you are lying to me". You simply just cant say it, just because..

 

How does it feel like to lie to someone who is important to you?

Or probably they arent?

But you pretended like they are.

 

Somehow, someday, it will reveal. Or probably, times up, no chances anymore. Time to say goodbye.

 

 

-Goodbye-

 

Ps; do you know that I can tell when something is up?

Because my instinct never fails.

They said ignorance is a bliss. Indeed they are right.

I have learned that someone who loves you will always be with you without any excuse. Not even the smallest one.

 

 

What if one day you wake up realising the person who means the world to you is gone?

 

 

Its been really awhile since the last post. I do not have anything to share, anymore.
But, here's a little update.

First thing ever, Alhamdulillah I have passed my third year though not flying colours. But still passed. Will try harder in future, insya Allah. And, congrats too to all my other friends who passed, see you in a week :)

Secondly, thank you dad for sponsoring half for my new lappy. I now have no reason that having a small screen makes it difficult, or uncomfortable to read slides. Have gotta work harder and get better result, and memorize things. 2 more years to end my study, so really gotta start working my ass off. Insya Allah, May Allah ease.

Thirdly, I have spent quite a nice holiday, well 2 months of holiday. Though I did not have any cool vacation, except Langkawi, but, I had a nice one, spent it with the people I love. Holiday is going to end in a week or so.

Fourth, my first posting will be surgery. Goodluck!

Okay, penat type guna laptop ni sebab space dia mcm..mengstresskan.

-I have learned that you can actually love someone, even with their deepest fu*king flaws-

Exam in a week! I am so dead. Not prepared at all, especially primary care and psychiatry. I dont really have the interest in both of them even though they are interesting, even the lecturers are cool. But. I feel like its too hard. Probably its because both of this postings takes only 4 weeks, well psychiatry only 3  weeks tho. So I feel like they are too short to digest everything in a month or less. Anyways, all the best, may Allah ease the way.

BUT, lepas exam, cuti. Wohoo! Can't wait for hols, really.

Raya! Langkawi!

So, in Sept probably need to prepare for 4th year, I.Allah kalau lepas 3rd year ni.. (AGH).

Pharmacologgyyy and anatomy and physiology kena mantapkan. But in one month, mcm impossible :( 

And oh, gotta hit the track lepas exam, losing weight is a must haha -__- 

Okay, selamat berpuasa btw! :)

Reading back (some of my) previous posts made me feel like "What hv I done?!" Hahah. I was so childish! Hahah, rasa nak delete this blog! Hahah. I feel like I was like an idiot, grammar tunggang langgang!(tho skrg pun still tunggang langgang!) OMG. And cerita pun tah apa2. Memalukan. (Am I still doing it now?) LMAO.

Okay, primary care dah setengah, tinggal lagi setengah. Then psychiatry for one month, end posting exam, then theory exams, thennnn cuti! For 2 freaking months! Walaupun ada elective posting for few weeks? EH? Haha.

Tolonglah Farah, start study dari sekarang.

-I have never been happier than this-

Its been awhile since the last time i updated my blog.

Sebab? Ada seorang manusia yang didnt give me the freedom of speech, freedom to say my heart out. Yes you, class rep. Haha, aku tau ko baca ni. 

So yeah, malas nk update blog, or prolly I'll just find a new place. Hahah. 

Bye.

I just hope someday it will get better, it will.. it will. I have faith in it.
But they said, if you don't work for it, it won't just happen.

Paeds end of posting exam is approaching. I shall strive for excellent (chewah!) Amin. But there'll be no hols after this EOP. Damn. And Aazhiv is coming to town! Wehee. Can't wait to see him! Mehehehe. 

-We can learn to love again-

Alhamdulillah for the results, medicine and surgery. Hope will do better in O&G, Paeds, Primary care and Psychiatry.. I.Allah. Congratulations to my other friends :)
I.Allah we will make it through this year, Amin :D

Paeds posting is going to end soon, like really soon, then nnt masuk primary care and psychiatry. So they as they said, primary care is like the scariest one. Sebab exam jadi macam short case, examiner ada sekali time exam, as in the patient bukan patient pun. They are like real docs. So yeah. Scary. Kalau biasa org tgk kita perform pun, confidence level dah  menjunam.. Ini kan yang mcm ni. terkubur terus kot. LOL.

Confidence level kena tinggi. Sangat tinggi. Haha, okay, bye.

We could have it our way. We could have done it so much better.

You shouldn't have given the chance, never. 


Oh, Im going to start my pediatrics posting this Monday. Hello little kids, I love kids, I hope you'll love me too. So it will ease my work. Muahaha.

I miss Aazhiv so bad :( He's grown up so fast! He is soon to be a one-year-old kid. Soon, Im gonna have to run and catch him. He's so big, so so big.

And oh, Alhamdulillah, Encik Farid dah selamat menjalankan ibadah umrah.

Im bored, and Im having this so-called seminar this Monday, FIRST DAY OF CLASS. And I don't know what to present. LOL.

Okay, bye.

Sometimes, things aren't easy the way we think they are. No, they aren't. So many obstacles, too many. No, maybe just one, but its too big. I couldn't get through it, I don't know how. I just can't. I have no super power to do so, I wish I have them, but I don't. But I know, Allah knows the best. "Kun Fa Ya Kun"


So why do we expect something and put high hope? Just do your part and let Allah show you the way. If ever things don't go the way you want them, remember, Allah has better plan. The best plan. Though sometimes, it takes some time, but somehow its the best. Always.

It has been quite some time, and I just can't tell what lies in the future. I wish I could, but nope, I can't and it is kinda.. disappointing.

Sometimes, the person that we wanted to understand us the most isn't the person who does it. Sometimes they are the opposite of what we hope they were. 

Long journey to go, i.Allah if there's a will, there'll always be a way. In Sha Allah. Lets just pray for the best.

They said, the best way to relieve stress is to"accept that you cannot change certain things".

First rotation examination result is out today. So yeah, Alhamdulillah, I passed my Medicine posting. Though I kinda flunked like damn flunked, but I am thankful that I passed. Sedih sebenarnya, sedih sangat2 result macam tu. But nak buat macam mana, sapa suruh tak study kuat2 -__-

Risaunya Surgery's.

O&G ni, dah la susah! Walaupun menarik, but susah! Semua benda nak lain. Hahaha. And my friend told me this story, ada sorg doctor ni masa dekat clinic, dia tanya "what is IE?", so one of my friends said "infective endocarditis" sekali kena "kepala hotak kau" HAHAHA. Yes, in medicine IE is infective endocarditis, but in O&G, IE means, Impending Eclampsia. Sungguh, memalukan. Tak apa, belajar dari kesilapan.

I.Allah ada usaha nnt adalah buahnya. 

ALLAH berfirman bermaksud:"..Dan Kami pasti akan uji kamu dengan sedikit rasa takut , rasa lapar, kekurangan harta, kekekurangan nyawa dan kekurangan buah-buahan. Dan berilah khabar gembira kepada orang yg sabar..".
[Al-Baqarah: 155]

Oh, I've gained size, weight(?) Nope, just my size. So yeah, I should get on diet like seriously. I've been saying this for ages, but I have never tried working on it to make it successful. No, I do not want to be anorexic, just to go 2 sizes down. But how? I am not the typical girl who gets mad when someone says "Farah, you are fat". I felt nothing. I mean, I don't have the I-MUST-NOT-EAT-SHOULD-STARVE-SELF-TO-BE-SKINNY kinda thing like most girls do, and I really hate it. Come on, I need that so I can be the girl who can be on diet like seriously on diet and get tensed up when someone says Im fat. Its not that I don't care but I just can't take it to motivate myself to start reduce my size. Cause, when I'm stressed or F-ed up, I eat like nobody's business, and I do not regret for eating one tub of ice cream, or cakes, or whatever that's fat-ish (fat-ish? lol)

Im bored and I dont know what to update, so thats why I haven't been updating since forever. So this is just a lame story that I have and sorry to waste your time over this not-beneficial-stuff. Oh I wonder if there are people who reads my blog. LOL. I am such a bore. Thanks for reading loyal readers :)

Sometimes, I wish things were different. Totally different.

If and only if we could turn back the time..

EOP SURGERY EXAM

End of posting exam is in 2 days plus. OSCE on Monday, MCQ, MEQ and SEQ on Tuesday, and finally clinical day on Wednesday. I am not ready, and I can never be ready. As what Dr.H said, learning medicine will never get you to finish reading and remember everything even if you finish with your MBBS course. And, the other lecturer, Dr.P said that MBBS is the basic course in medicine. So, these, what I'm learning are just basic, and yet I could not finish reading and remembering all. Hm.

Well, lets just pray for the best. Classmates, housemates and batchmates, All the best. May Allah ease.

And, I can't wait to meet Aazhiv next weekend! Wohooo!:D Im a happy aunt! ;D

7 days to EOP exam

I'm dead. Seriously. I am not ready for this surgery exam. Sebab, pergi clinic Doc tanya soalan first year, suruh explain pasal kidney, anatomically, blur, tak boleh jawab. Then pergi OT, kena tanya pasal inguinal canal, tersenyap lagi. Apa yang ada dalam ingatan ni, hanyalah 1%. Lagi 99% tu mana pergi, tak tahu :(

Then exam kali ni macam x boleh predict what kind of questions Doc akan suka tnya, sebab kurang BST. Lepas tu apa pun macam tak ingat. Sigh. Terasa anatomy sangat teruk. Ugh.

Oh I went to see 2 ops. Appendectomy and herniactomy. Both are awesome. But herniactomy made me feel like surgery ni interesting jugak sebenarnya. Ye lah, sebab sebelum ni terasa like medicine yg paling best. LOL. But the surgeon made me realise that surgery ni sangat lah cool. I learnt a lot from her. She's good, and I hope I will be like her, someday, Amin..

Kalau nak cerita what happened from A-Z, mata ni berhenti kerja dulu sebelum tangan. 

Ok, nak tidur. Bye!